Positive Parenting: 5 Reasons to not compare your child to anyone else
PuneNow, July 04, 2023: Children are like tender saplings. How parents raise their children will determine whether they develop into healthy trees that provide fruit, shade, and shelter for all, or thorny bushes that harm everyone.
In our eagerness to raise a good child, we occasionally make mistakes, though no one intentionally raises a child to be less than the most ideal human to ever have lived. One thing for sure though, never compare your child to anyone else and there are plenty of good reasons for that, out of which, I am going to list and explain the 5 most important ones below.
Reasons to Never Compare Your Child to Anyone
Before we discuss these reasons, it is important to note that there is no hard-and-fast rule for childrearing, and every parent knows how to raise their children. This list was compiled based on observations, experience sharing, and interviews with both parents and children. This article is a continuation of series of articles on positive parenting on our website.
1. Every Child is Unique
Each child is born with a unique combination of strengths, weaknesses, preferences, and aversions. Therefore, they will move in the direction that best suits them if they are given the freedom to do so. If not, you are attempting to alter the course of a river that would either cause the entire region to become parched or flooded.
Rather, foster their individuality, comprehend their desires, and guide them in their area of interest. This suppression of natural uniqueness is the result of comparison, which results in a confused and disoriented personality.
2. Inferiority Complex
Constant comparison with others causes a child to develop an inferiority complex and low self-esteem. The child begins to feel worthless and becomes increasingly withdrawn. Over time, the child may lose confidence in their abilities and settle for a lower quality of life. In addition, they begin to view the subject of comparison as a superhuman and eventually abandon even their own abilities.
3. Rebellious Attitude
When a child is pushed into a corner by constant unfavorable comparisons, he or she may begin to harbor negative emotions and abandon all efforts to become a good and successful person. Instead, they may seek solace in the company of other outlaws and turn their backs on the world, developing a defiant attitude that may become difficult to control in the future.
4. Suppression of Strengths
If the child is constantly compared to others, a compliant child may wish to follow in the footsteps of the subject of comparison. This will result in the child abandoning their own strengths and interests. On the other hand, the child may not possess the same abilities as the child being compared.
As a result, the child is unable to capitalize on his or her own strengths or become exactly like the comparison child. At best, he or she will become a mediocre human.
5. Closing Doors of Development
By not encouraging the child to become what he or she desires, you are stifling their creativity and suffocating their development. In this manner, they will develop into underconfident and partially skilled adults who are incapable of achieving the heights they deserve.
Let them identify their strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, and their ambitions and support them in their journey towards achieving their dreams. Be there as a guiding light, holding and supporting them through every step or misstep.
These were the compelling arguments why you should never compare your child to anyone. Agreed, you don’t want to raise a thorny bush, but you also shouldn’t make a bonsai out of a sapling that had the potential to grow into a large tree that would provide fruit, shade, and shelter to everyone in the world.
Be a torchbearer in their lives, illuminating the path they choose to take. Walk alongside them to prevent them from slipping and falling. Be their pillar of support and watch them grow into a fine human being.
