Positive Parenting: Parents are adopting this technique worldwide to raise happy and successful children

PuneNow, June 07, 2023: Positive parenting is all about using positive reinforcement, while avoiding punishments and penalties while raising a child. This technique focusses on encouraging good behavior instead of punishing bad behavior.

Positive parenting may seem to be a lengthier route towards making your child understand the importance of good behavior and staying away from bad behavior, it is a sure shot way of ensuring the child learns the importance of good behavior with conviction, rather than the fear of penalty.

Using positive parenting sets the right course towards the personality development of the child from an early stage and his/her values get formed around good behavior, while understanding the drawbacks of bad behavior. In this article we shall look at some simple techniques you can use while raising a child of any age to nurture good behavior.

Set Rules in a Positive Way

Set rules and boundaries together instead of simply imposing them on the child. If the child clearly knows the reason behind why he/she is being asked to do something or being forbidden from doing something, it is easier for the child to comprehend and follow it. Instead if you choose to simply make a rule for the child to follow, you are displaying dictatorial behavior and all dictatorships are prone to revolts. 

So take your time, sit down with your child and discuss any new rule or boundary, explain the logics and answer all the questions the child might have before finalizing them. That way there is more participation from the child and the feeling of being ruled does not develop.

Be Flexible – Keep Adapting

The child will be passing through different phases of life, depending on their current age and accordingly their behavior will change. For example, teenagers will find it difficult to adjust to any new set of rules and make as many more questions than when they were younger. 

Be ready for this change and keep adapting with the child’s ever evolving behavior. I know its easier said than done but then nobody said parenting was an easy job!

Use Mistakes to Teach

The child is bound to make mistakes and keep erring. Don’t snap at them for every rule broken or every boundary breached. Instead use these instances as opportunities to teach them what they did wrong and what was expected of them. 

At times, you might have to go further explaining to them how you would have acted in such a situation. Try to be their role model rather than a law-enforcement agency.

Reward Desired Behavior

Don’t let go of any opportunity to reward desired behavior exhibited by the child. This a solid opportunity to reinforce good behavior and cement it for future. You can never go wrong with positive reinforcement and it is the best approach to clear the fog in your child’s mind for him/her to be able to distinguish between good and bad behavior.

Avoid Punishments

Positive parenting experts absolutely scoff at the idea of punishing a child to penalize bad behavior. Punishing a child only pushes the problem under the carpet out of view but that does not by any chance mean the problematic behavior has gone away. 

Punishments may seem to work quickly but they create a chasm between you and your child and it keeps getting wider with every subsequent punishment. The old idiom, “Spare the rod, spoil the child” does not hold any relevance in these times. 

The children these days are at a much higher level of awareness and self realization and demand an equitable treatment. So punishment or penalty may seem to be a quick fix solution but they do more harm than good in the long run.

Maintain Communication

Whatever stage of life you child may be in, don’t forget to communicate with them continuously. You might have to keep tuning your conversations with them depending upon their age but make sure you talk to them and spend enough time with them. Watch their favorite TV program with them, engage with them in their favorite pastime or go and spend time together outdoors. 

This time you are spending with your child is an investment you are never going to regret having made. There is another benefit of spending a lot of quality time with your child, you get to cherish every stage of their childhood, something which rolls out only one way, so you are never going to get to go back and enjoy these stages of your child’s childhood.

Children are like a clean slate when they are born. They become what you make of them. The foundations on which you raise them influence what they grow to be. If you give them a happy, healthy, and a fair upbringing, they will grow into deep rooted, large and strong trees that will not waver against any storms in their lives! Happy parenting.

“To be in your children’s memory tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today”

Barbara Johnson